Focusing: When Words Alone Aren't Enough

I sit in front of my computer trying to find the words to describe Focusing, a practice founded by Eugene Gendlin. I can show you, better than I can tell you. Though the challenge is to articulate the experience. The challenge is to teach the philosophy and experiential understanding.

In the simplest of terms, focusing is an experiential embodiment of self-reflection. One may relate it to meditation in that both create a non-judgmental space in the present, but they are different. Focusing creates space for meaning to form. It is an allowing to happen; allowing to come into focus. I can’t “find” the words to describe what focusing is. Focusing is making clear what is described as the “murky edge”, the fuzziness of what is unclear or vague, the felt sense. It is the inward process paired with outward expression into interaction. I must allow the words to come to me through felt sensing. Felt sense is a verb; it is a movement, a being with. Focusing reconnects language with the perpetual living experience, highlighting the integration of the mind and body.

I imagine, for someone unaware of focusing, the previous paragraph makes very little sense. How does one embody self-reflection? And what are we “allowing to happen”, or “come into focus”? Well, the body interacts with an experience before the heart and mind make sense of it. Focusing is attuning to the full body experience. Our bodies are constantly signaling us, and so often we miss it or dismiss it. Felt sense is an experiential path, the interaction process, that allows for an in-depth understanding to emerge. Rather than a word or two, an image or phrase to describe a part of a sensation, in focusing, we ask ourselves, “How is the whole of me experiencing all of this”? The felt sense is the movement through the sensations of the whole. Felt sense can include thoughts, feelings, intuitions, but it is also more than that. Our bodies call for us to slow down enough to receive so much more from any given experience. In focusing, we are called to find the “more” that is always there. Our bodies are the vessel that leads us into carrying forward, the tendency to live into experiences. 

Focusing, though, can be practiced alone, is mostly practiced with another person, the focuser and the witness. While focusing, the focuser and the witness may notice the layers of the felt sense dimension of the human experience beginning to unfold. What was once unclear now has many pathways to explore. The role of the witness is to listen in an attentive, open-minded, and open-hearted way. The witness may also mirror or reflect what is being described, supporting the exploration.

Our lives are much more complex than the simple expression of “I feel good” or “I feel bad”. In any given situation, we may ask ourselves whether we should follow our mind or our hearts, listen to our intuition or our logical mind. There are moments when the mind and heart disagree, or our intuition and logic are not aligned. Focusing invites us to open ourselves to the whole, asking what it is like to experience all of it; Moreover, it is an invitation to explore the rich bodily-felt experience of our lives with curiosity, while awaiting the wholeness to respond. There is more depth in our experience of our own lives than we allow ourselves to know. The beautiful thing is that our bodies know long before we are conscious of it. When we learn to listen to our felt sense through Focusing, we allow ourselves to listen to the messages that our bodies are sending us.

At the core of the focusing process is the ability to stay with the “murky edge”, the unclear felt sense. There is a part of you that is trying to tell you something. We are called to be with the message without judgment and from an open perspective. Focusing creates more capacity to experience new perspectives. As previously mentioned, your body experiences before the mind and heart make sense of what is experienced. When focusing, you come in contact with the world of experiences held in your body, and can deeply understand how you are living in a situation, a relationship, an environment, a challenge, a problem, etc. As you stay with the felt sense, listening for the words to describe how you are feeling and experiencing the whole, something shifts. The unclear, vague, “murky edge” begins to form, and new possibilities emerge from spaces that once felt “stuck”. This release is known as the felt shift, creating a new way of carrying forward.

According to Gendlin’s book Focusing, there are six steps to understanding the process. Now, these six steps are not strict instructions, as that would defeat the purpose of authentic self-exploration. However, these six steps are basic instructions to inform the foundation of Focusing.

Step 1: Make space

Give yourself space and time to pause. Stillness. Relax. Breathe. Now take a moment to look inward. Observe the inner world. Ask yourself, “How do I find myself? What is going on in my life right now? What is the main theme for me right now”? Listen and wait for what comes to you. DO NOT SEARCH FOR AN ANSWER. DO NOT DIVE INTO WHAT COMES. Keep a healthy distance. Name it and listen for what else may come. Often, a few things will come up.

Step 2: The Murky Edge (Felt Sense)

Choose one thing to focus on, while still maintaining a distance. There are many parts when exploring a problem, often too many parts to think of each one alone. So, get a sense of what ALL the problem feels like. Allow yourself to sit in the vague, murkiness. 

Step 3: Discern

What is the quality of the felt sense? What’s the weather inside? Allow a word, phrase, image, or symbol to come from the felt sense. Stay with the felt sense until something feels right.

Step 4: Resonate

Go back and forth between the felt sense and the word, phrase, or image until it truly resonates. Look out for a signal in the body letting you know that it is a good fit. You may notice the felt sense change or maybe the word/phrase. Allow it to until they both feel just right in understanding the felt sense.

Step 5: Asking

Ask yourself, “What is it about this whole problem that makes this quality”? Be sure that this is actively sensed, not a resonance that is remembered. Allow the logical, thinking brain to fall away, and feel the shifts within your body. When you are with the freshly felt sense, tap it, touch it, be with it. Ask it questions like, “What makes the whole problem so ____”?

Step 6: Receiving

Receive whatever comes in a judgment-free and friendly way. Stay with it a while, even if only a slight release. Be curious about it. There is room for many shifts to occur. 

If at any point you have made contact with a vague, unclear sense within yourself, then you have focused, whether you have sensed a shift or not. Body shifts cannot be controlled. They come on their own. 

Focusing allows you to explore and unfold just how deep you can go in any given experience, deepening the integration of the mind, body, and spirit. A new perspective comes with creative resolutions. Merleau-Ponty said, “The world is not what you think, but what you live through”. There is so much depth in the human experience. How deep are you willing to go?